I live sandwiched between a two-lane highway and a national park. That kinda makes it sound cramped and compressed but it’s not. Hmm. It’s more of a relaxed, meatball sub instead of a smooshed grilled cheese. You know what I mean.
Anyway, there are deer and chipmunks and coyotes and EVIDENTLY A COUGAR.
Can you read that? The notice about how there is an apex predator in the neighborhood that someone wanted to warn us about by putting pencil to freaking yellow paper?
PENCIL! YELLOW PAPER!
Seems like whoever wrote this isn’t going to be that sad that someone and/or their pet goes missing. Oh wait! What if this is the murderer’s preamble? Plausible deniability? Ooohhhhh. What if it’s for ME?!?!?
Also, those e’s kinda bother me. They look like part of the Michelin Man, all wayward and round.
I had a countdown going on for a minute there. It was for my vacation, in case you were curious. I had all kinds of plans for the blog countdown – a quick post daily, photos of the dogs every day so then I could make a cute video. Whole lotta nope.
I can think of two schools of thought to that – either I’m putting too much pressure on myself to do something that is a hobby, OR, stop being a lazy, procrastinating asshole. You can probably tell I agree more with the latter. Because I am a jerk. An undisciplined jerk.
Now that I’ve explained, I need a new countdown date. I have a bday with a zero in it coming up, so I could do that. No I will not say which decade I will be entering because you would be shocked, shocked and dismayed, by my immaturity. My emotional development stopped somewhere in the high teens but luckily I have other qualities that balance that out. Or that’s what I’m assuming because I do have friends that aren’t family and I am married so someone likes me.
Holy crap I just googled it’s less than 60 days until I am ?0.
Did I tell you I grew up in a boarding school? Well, I grew up in a boarding school. One of the first things they did will drill in the importance of schedules. We all (twenty or so) would have to sit in the common room and draw our own schedule charts.
This is good when you are young and wild and unruly. Now, I think I would be considered in the more stringent term of “regimented”, which can make things a wee bit boring. This was kind of the point of this blog, to make me think about my days because you can pretty much set your clock by me.
I know my dogs do. Especially Mayhem. And she likes it. When I do something out of order or the timing of things are disrupted, she is fully aware.
However, for me, the human, it makes it hard for me to change things up. You know, thrill myself by vacuuming in the morning instead of the afternoon, pushing back snuggle time to work on a project. I will want to work out, or do some writing, but discover I’m 15 minutes past my target start time so I won’t do it, then start early on the next thing. Oooo an extra load of laundry. Goody. And so I get bored. Cage of my own making.
Anyhow, just thoughts, and me mixing up my evening by doing this blah blah post.
My developmental editor ghosted me. Is that a sign?
I’ve been working with her for two months, and have learned a lot. I’ve been trying (mostly thinking) about writing this book for over a decade. Just recently I got serious about it and decided I needed some real hand-holding. I was overthinking things and totally lost. So I found her off of a reputable resource.
Anyway, sent off my payment for February, did my assigned work, and on our zoom day, nothing. Two days later I still haven’t heard a word.
This made me question everything. I took it to the whole drama level-is this indicative of my future? Am I wasting my time? Should I just give up?
WHAT HAVE I DONE WITH MY LIFE I’M A FAILURE!!!
For a whole day I wallowed, I cried, I had a mini breakdown. I walked the dogs until they resented me. Truthfully, it was due.
But I woke up today better. I just dread the email I have to send her asking for my money back. I don’t know what’s with me being nice to people who aren’t nice to me. I think: how long should I give her? What if there is a real excuse? Should I wait for her to reach out?
I think I’ll wait until Monday afternoon…see if she reaches out. If not, I will, but I have to break it off. This is not cool. What could be a legit excuse? Death in the family? She’s in the hospital? Those are probably the only two. What the difference is in 24 hours I dunno.
There has been much celebrating, in the form of rolling on the ground, biting ankles, biting toys, scavaging for rabbit poo, and barking just to bark. I think she wanted to burn the cone under the full moon and dance around it.
I was hesitant to take the cone off, but my husband said the stitches were done doing their thing, and most of the healing under the scab was done. It’s nice having a paramedic / EMT spousal unit. It’s like having a reference book you don’t have to carry around. And what am I a reference for? Well, if he is interested in story structure and genre and themes and the hero’s journey, well, he knows who to turn to.
Took the pups on a hike today. A new trail and I was getting quite bored. Trees rocks snow, kaaaaay. Then I met some people coming up the trail and they mentioned caves. Caves? Yes, I will cross the stream twice over slippery, crackling ice to see limestone caves. And we did.
OMG you guys talk about out of sight out of mind! My posting completely fell off my radar dealing with holidays and dog injuries. But the cyst removed from Mayhem’s paw is NOT CANCER!!! Hooooraaaaayyyyyy!!!!!! My husband was so happy I think that if I had asked him to buy me a new car he would have said yes without a moment’s hesitation.
Things have settled down for now, but it was mayhem (ha ha) for a minute. And I was naughty. I had work due for my development editor, and I totally slacked. Well, went on an outlining tangent, and didn’t get my chapters done. She was forgiving about it but still didn’t want to meet until I completed what I was supposed to.
This is good. I get manic on things sometimes and cannot be indulged. That’s precisely why I need her.
Lessons learned from long-term dog coning:
Wrapping the dog’s foot to the point it becomes a mitten is a bad thing when the injury is supposed to breathe. Mayhem has a thick neck and slim head (better to bite your ankles with), so she would rear up, put her paws by her neck and push her cone off. Impressive and fancy raccoon work, the little shit.
Communicating to your vet that you were having cone problems is essential. I brought the cone, harness, collar, and duct tape to him, per his request. He then performed a tiny miracle. Photos below.
Use the sedation drugs.
Every. Single. Loop. Secured!!
They made bows out of duct tape. Bless their hearts.
I tried every dog bootie I had, and what worked the best was double-upped Ziploc bags and medical tape. The stretchy fabric kind. She couldn’t get her stitches wet because they would dissolve with moisture (hence the cone for no licky-licky), and of course, we had a big snowstorm and the snow is still hanging around. I’ve been through about two bags of Ziplocs.
At this point, the cone is beaten to crap and I’m hoping to get it off this weekend. Just waiting for the scab to fall off, but it’s locked on tight right now like a crusty barnacle.
When this cone comes off this girl deserves an all-day puppy party. For a dog that abhors people touching her feet, she has let me get all up in her foot business and has not once barked or whined about the cone. This girl is a champ.
Mayhem’s surgery went well. Vet techs gave me all these instructions about what she can and cannot do, how much to eat, drink…but they couldn’t get her down the hall by themselves and she had already gotten out of her cone – I had to go get her LOL
Vet invoices already sent on to pet insurance. Hey, everyone, get pet insurance
Poor Olive wants to hike and walk, but the snow is so cold it burns, and when it hurts she doesn’t hold her paw up for help – she lays down in the snow. I had to drag all 70 lbs of her out of the unplowed cul-de-sac
I slept through my alarm this morning. Swear it was that drink I mentioned yesterday.
Going through my chapters this afternoon, and I really have to stop myself from editing as I go. I just recently learned that you were just supposed to charge through. You’re supposed to come back later, several times actually: tweak your story, then your writing, then micro-tweak your sentences. I’ve always jumped to micro-tweak.
I’m so sick of this damn story I dread going through it again, but I promised myself that I would finish it. I wish I got a developmental editor years ago, even if it was just for a month or two.
Took Mayhem to the vet this morning for a cyst on her front paw. They don’t like the look of it and think it might be cancerous, surgery scheduled for tomorrow morning. I have to admit that I did cry in the waiting room. I am still very scarred about what happened with Max, but I also learned a lot.
Stay calm, don’t freak out, wait for test results. In the meantime, love and play.