I have to be willing to make a hot loud mess of things sometimes to get the life that I want.
When I look at my life there are some things that stand out that I didn’t do that I wish I did. Wanna hear em? Yeah you do.
In no particular order:
- Outrigger canoe club in high school (yes we had that)
- Taking that one job in Northern California that helped people learn to read. I still remember the interviewers name, almost 30 years later (I just tried to google her name is too common)
- Applying to that design college
- Go to college for journalism
- Learned to surf
Ok there’s a lot more but they aren’t that interesting, and the point is: I was too scared/intimidated to do those things, and when I look back now through my Old Lady Lens, I know I was totally capable. If only I wasn’t such a big SCARDY CAT! Still am.
Hmmm. I should get to the bottom of that so I’ll stop being a spaz and self sabotaging.
So it’s not that I am afraid of making a mess, it’s that I’m afraid of failing.
Ugh. Cliche. But who the hell isn’t?
freckled crab 